In the last year, have you regrettably binged a show? (Me too.) Have you unexpectedly stayed up late scrolling through social media? (Um, at least three nights a week.) Have you felt unmotivated, strangely empty, or had a lack of energy and focus? (Guilty as charged.)
If you're like me, then you might be experiencing something called languishing.
Adam Grant describes languishing as that blah feeling, the void between depression and flourishing, the absence of well-being. “The dulling of delight and the dwindling of drive.” You don’t have the symptoms of mental illness but you’re not doing so hot either. It’s characterized by going through the motions and joylessness, “as if you’re muddling through your day, looking at your life through a foggy windshield.”
Just…blah. Can anyone relate?
It’s no surprise that this is common for a lot of Young Lifers because one of the strongest factors in motivation is progress. When I first started reading Grant's article in the New York Times and listened to his TED Talk, I thought, “I’ll just pass this on to some college staff, maybe it will be useful for their students or for themselves…” And then upon reading further, I realized it was for me. I have been languishing.
Here's the question though: How do we turn our languishing into flourishing? The acronym MAID will help because, you know, you were MAID for this!
MINDFULNESS:
Decrease distraction to get in “flow” – turn your phone off for 1.5 hours tomorrow and work on something significant you’ve been putting off. Then try it again the next day. (Even writing this little paragraph felt like progress. I turned my phone off and put it in another room!)
ACT:
Do something! Be active while doing what you do every day. For me, I started walking on the treadmill while making a couple of calls. (For the folks who wouldn’t mind.)
It is easier to act your way to a new way of thinking than it is to think your way into a new way of acting.
INCREASE POSITIVE EMOTIONS:
Self-care – Take a nap, go to bed early two nights in a row, take a full day off with no Young Life, have something you look forward to doing every day.
Relationships – Give a call to someone who is very important to you but you haven’t talked to in a while. Call a couple of your alumni or old Young Life kids. Look at old photos and remember God's faithfulness in lives changed.
DEEPER MEANING:
If we're motivated by progress, let's name the progress. We all want to matter and make a difference! It has been harder to see impact during COVID so let’s get out our magnifying glass and make sure we’re looking.
As we come down the home stretch of the semester, remember and celebrate. Celebrate the small wins or plan a celebration night. Get lots of sparkling cider and fun glasses and toast where you’ve seen God work!
Let’s light a path out of this blah and get back to John 10:10 flourishing.
Written by: Pete Hardesty, Eastern/Northeastern YLC Divisional Coordinator